Seven Year Itch? – Does It Really Exist?

The Seven Year Itch – Does It Really Exist?

The Seven Year Itch - Does It Really Exist?

 

Only twenty five percent of the primate species are monogamous, and less than five percent of mammals form a monogamous bond to raise their offspring.

Ninety percent of bird species team up to raise their young, but most only do so while the young are vulnerable.

Once they are grown, the pair separates.

Helen Fisher, a biological anthropologist at Rutgers University and author of Anatomy of Love: The Natural History of Monogamy, Adultery and Divorce, told Scientific American that for several years she has been investigating whether the "seven-year itch”, or the tendency to get divorced after seven years of marriage really exists, and if it does, is there is a biological basis for it.

The Length Of Time Is Not Necessarily Seven Years

"I began by studying worldwide data on marriage and divorce and noticed that although the median duration of marriage was seven years, of the couples who divorced, most did so around their fourth year".

"I also found that divorce occurred most frequently among couples at the height of their reproductive and parenting years—for men, ages 25 to 29, and for women, ages 20 to 24 and 25 to 29—and among those with one dependent child".

"In hunter-gatherer societies, women tended to have children around four years apart. Equally, it was around four years old that the children moved on to be raised by broader community groups rather than their parents, who were then free to find new partners if they chose to. The four-year divorce peak among modern humans may be an evolutionary hangover from this time".

Helen Fisher said.

Two Different Movies

Groups who oppose divorce celebrated the documentary movie March of the Penguins, because it showed monogamous pairs of penguins lovingly raising their young, and they thought that nature was giving us a sign that we had let things slide, and were forgetting our natural obligations.

However, if they viewed the movie called March of the Mallards, they would have seen ducks mating in what amounts to an orgy, involving males who rather than being faithful had a good chance of going on to perform necrophilia.

Seven Year Itch Or Four Year Itch?

Humans are not overly consistent in any of their actions throughout a lifetime, and according to the business site Fast Company.

"The median number of years a US worker has been in his or her current job is just 4.4".

Do You Have A Secret?

If you’ve been married for four or seven plus years and still enjoy or even yearn for sex with your husband or wife, and still can’t wait for them to walk through the door, then please share the secret and maybe help others.

Comments are welcome and you don’t need to log in to post them.

This entry was posted in evolution, family, family planning, infidelity, jealousy, love, Misconceptions, parents, Relationships, Sex, urban legends and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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4 Responses to Seven Year Itch? – Does It Really Exist?

  1. straight-talker says:

    The following are some ideas that will help a man please a woman in bed.

    If women are happy and feeling good then they’ll enjoy the sex.

    Men need to feel relaxed and maintaining a sense of humor will help ease the anxiety that’s often caused by, “Will I be good?”, and “Will she like it?’.

    Remember that sex should be more about pleasing your partner than pleasing yourself, so she should come first and then you.

    Warm loving and gentle foreplay is important, so forget the “Wham, bam, thank you Mam”, approach.

    Be confident and take control, but do it in a warm and loving way.

    Tell the lady nice things or even dirty things if that arouses her, but know when to stop talking. Don’t ramble on when she’s having her climax or o*****.

    After the act is finished, hold the lady close and let her melt into your arms. Don’t leap out of bed to watch TV or make a sandwich etc.

  2. gillian says:

    What worked for me was improving our every day relationship, and I highly reccomend it.

    Be tender in supposedly unromantic situations and locations, display empathy, and give words of encouragement and praise, and an improving sex life will naturally flourish.

    You need a deep bond of love between you, to know each other really well, and to be able to read one another’s emotions and thoughts.

    It would be silly to expect romance in an atmosphere of frustration and constant arguing, so people who are not able to maintain a happy and rewarding relationship will never have a truly satisfying sex life

    One or the other will get bored as soon as it starts to go sour, and they will look for new excitement to fill the vacuum.

  3. Gina Robinson says:

    Let’s consider ..

    Your children have just drifted off to sleep and you and your spouse have just finished up your nightly chores.

    The available options are now most likely to be:

    Watching the nightly news on the television in your room.
    Reading a book or magazine.
    Or maybe having sex with your spouse if she or he is up for it.

    If the option of sex seems like yet another chore on your daily list and the idea of reading a chapter in your new book or watching the daily sports scores on the news seems more exciting, then you and your spouse might be suffering from sex-rut syndrome.

    Sex-Rut syndrome

    This syndrome has not yet made it into the medical books, but it does appear to exist; so how do we cure this problem that plagues so many marriages?

    Communication

    Like others have posted communication is the key but just talking about sex most likely won’t cure the problem so try some of these:

    Your Day Dreams

    Day dreams are the place to explore what you might like to do with your spouse.

    So maybe spend fifteen minutes every day having a sexual fantasy, and you don’t have to fantasize about your spouse, it can be anyone.

    What you are looking for in your fantasies is what is being done, how it is being done, and how much you enjoy it.

    Write some of your fantasies down on paper and maybe try them out in the bedroom or even over the kithchen table.

    You Get What You Put In Or Out

    Many woman complain that their men aren’t romantic enough to get them in the mood for sex.

    But many men feel too unappreciated to want to give romance to their wives to put them in the mood for sex, and the problem here is expecting the other person to put us in the mood.

    If a woman wants exciting sex, then she has to act like she wants exciting sex!

    Most men will agree that when a woman seems turned on by them, and acts as if she can’t get enough of their manliness, then he in turn can’t wait to get his hands all over her.

    Take time to laugh with your partner every day.

    Spend time connecting with one another everyday.

    Spend time doing little things that show each other how appreciated they are.

    And flirt with each other during the day to set up a sexual mood, and then maybe make the fantasy real!

  4. MacTheKnife says:

    I’d personally say that the number one way to improve your sex life is to be open to making changes.

    And I’ve been married eight times so I should know!

    Hey, just kidding, I’ve only been married two or three times like most people ;-)

    For Women

    Maybe take some kind of course such as belly dancing, yoga, or even a stripper class.

    They can all be fun, and they’re all are available for women only so you won’t be embarrassed!

    They’ll give you the opportunity to move your body and to get in touch with your sexuality and hopefully also expand your comfort zone.

    Buy new lingerie that you feel comfortable in and that you feel s*** in.

    For Men And Women

    No belly dancing or stripper classes for the men, but compliments work!

    Compliments don’t just work for women, but they work for for men too.

    Men have insecurities just like women so compliments from either people are going to get you into the bedroom, and will most likely keep you in there longer too!

    But make the compliments very specific, not just generic like, "You look great tonight!".

    Hey, he or she doesn’t normally look great?

    Be willing to try new things.

    If you’re totally against trying new things then that’s fine.

    However, even if you have just a vague feeling that it might work and the idea doesn’t offend you then go for it!

    If after you tried it, and either you or your partner didn’t like it then maybe never do it again.

    Be affectionate to each other.

    Too many couples I know simply exchange a kiss in the morning and one at night; so try holding hands, brushing the hair out of her or his eyes, and remember that little touches can often have a lot of meaning behind them.

    Maybe, be a little naughty.

    Maybe send a text message to your partner to get them riled during the day.

    Say what you’re wearing (or not wearing), then tell them you have to go and hang up.

    Anticipation leads to imagination and excitement vice versa.

    Finally and probably most important, communicate and make sure both of you have private time for each other.

    If you want to try something (or not try something), then tell your partner.

    Your partner should be OK with whatever you want to do, so hear them out and be willing to compromise.

    Lead or guide them, and be willing to take and give direction.

    Ultimately both partners should be satisfied and it’s not all about just one person.!